JOY Eurovision

30 Apr 2018

From the 2018 Press Bubble: Day 2

And it’s day 2 in the Eurovision press bubble. The rehearsals for the second half of Semi 1 are about to begin.

Well, they will after we finish seeing a travel ad on the screen…

FYR Macedonia

Eye Cue don’t want Aisel to outdo them in the underwear stakes, so they’ve resorted to a skirt that barely hides a thing. You get all the cheeks from FYRoM.

They’ve also decided to raid Spotlight to fancy up the costumes they stole from Skopje’s kids gymnastics club.

Marija has a hold on those vocals, with thanks to her backing singers. And Bojan looks as sexy as ever (if you’re a fan of bald-headed bearded men).

Day two of rehearsals at #ESC2018 kicks off with @eyecueofficial on stage, and their cool beats are getting us excited for the day! #AllAboard pic.twitter.com/wd5GGqNBAq

— Eurovision Song Contest (@Eurovision) April 30, 2018

The shiny dresses should work well for the drinking games. The song is a lesson in value for money and Europe should see the benefits of it on the night.

Croatia

Croatia and Belgium obviously only had one discount card between them for the bulk fabric shop and decided to go shopping together this year. In times of European austerity, sharing discounts makes sense. However, at Eurovision, it’s probably not the best idea.

https://twitter.com/Eurovision/status/990896542612680704

But back to the song. Franka basically nailed it, even with the I-can-see-every-pore-on-your-face close-up shot at the beginning.

Can someone apply the heavy duty HD make up please?

This is a solid uptempo ballad from Croatia, and the added extras of wind machine and choppy transitions give it a sultry edge that Belgium could probably use.

Austria

Vienna has lift off!

The European Space Station has donated some spare parts for Cesár’s staging this year and it looks a treat. You’ll be ooh-ing and ahh-ing when you see just how high in the sky the fella gets.

https://twitter.com/Eurovision/status/990909449148694530

Team that with some shiny astronaut casual wear, and you have quite the performance. The baggy pants are a worry though. Too much material Austria – we want the guns show!

Small issue is the fact there are cameras. It’s a TV show after all, so…

https://twitter.com/JOY_Eurovision/status/990907843615297536

If this one doesn’t qualify, Austrians deserve to be upset.

Greece

We know that Greece is poor. We know they can hardly afford bread. So we know that austerity will continue on to the Eurovision stage.

But not enough money to even finish the dress? Come on. It’s holey (and not in a good way).

The Greeks have obviously spent the money on Yianna’s sleeves, which have very thoughtfully provided another few shots in the drinking game – white wings that flutter in the wind machine.

https://www.instagram.com/p/BiMW4NXlENb

A strong vocal performance from #Greece and some very cinematic camera pans. Yianna holds up a blue palm at various points in the song which is an ode to Greece and the #Greek people. #Eurovision #AllAboard #escYOUnited

— escYOUnited (@ESCunited) April 30, 2018

It’s all very Greek (on a small budget).

Get to know your Australian jurors and spokesperson

We’ve had confirmation of some names for this year’s Contest from SBS.

Your five jurors have been announced, chaired by Richard ‘Dickie’ Wilkins.

https://twitter.com/JOY_Eurovision/status/990904152250306562

And even bigger is the announcement of this year’s spokesperson. And not, it’s not Lee Lin Chin.

https://twitter.com/JOY_Eurovision/status/990912233503887360

Share your thoughts about the picks on social media – @JOY_Eurovision

I am okay with this. https://t.co/GLpIN7QJQV

— tanaya qoifoog (@qoifoog) April 30, 2018

https://twitter.com/WindMachinePod/status/990912792558383105

Lee Lin Chin has been incredible and we've loved her, but all great things must come to an end. Ricardo is a legend and is of Portuguese descent. SBS is a multicultural channel and why many Australians love the contest. He'll be great and is a Eurovision tragjc.

— Aussievision (@aussievisionnet) April 30, 2018

Finland

https://twitter.com/JOY_Eurovision/status/990936585087614976

Neon lights: check 🍸

Glitter: check 🍸

Hot dancers: check 🍸🍸

A set with moving parts: check 🍸

Leather harnesses: check 🍸🍸🍸

Sequined high, high boots: check 🍸🍸🍸

Lasers: check 🍸

Pyros: check 🍸

Stage dive: check 🍸🍸🍸

PYRO CURTAIN AND ARMS SHOOTING PYRO: CHECK! 🍸🍸🍸🍸🍸🍸🍸🍸🍸🍸🍸

https://twitter.com/Eurovision/status/990944399533248512

This is brilliance.

Armenia

https://twitter.com/JOY_Eurovision/status/990947988657901569

This one is very Armenian.

After a drink, you’ll admire Sevak’s beard and after a few more you’ll have a better ideas of what the Albanians are trying to achieve with this performance.

Switzerland

Coco has abs and she’s not scared of showing them.

She’s also not scared of showing off her leather collection.

Thankfully, Coco is wearing her trademark hat so everything is OK with the world.

https://www.instagram.com/p/BiMtP-JFqdq

The siblings are rocking Stones, and it should certainly make a mark on the first semi. Being stuck behind his big drums, Stee leaves Coco to do the walking, utilising the stage’s bridge and front catwalk.

It’s sexy, it’s brash, it’s fierce… and it’s by a brother and sister duo. Perhaps the Murphys could re-create it.

Ireland

We’ve already said that we love Ryan’s song. And we love the video. But we don’t necessarily think they match.

The Irish delegation are persisting with the video’s message with the return of the two dancers.

However, they’re joined by another love story between a man and a woman.

Can this one sooth the angry Russian beast?

https://twitter.com/JOY_Eurovision/status/991009766720901120

We hope so. Ryan sounds beautiful and the dancers are perfection. Hopefully this one is a qualifier for Eurovision’s most successful country.

Cyprus

With Greece not giving us much in the way of excitement, we turned to Cyprus with the hope that they would deliver an eruption of campness to close the first semi.

And thank goodness, we were not disappointed.

https://twitter.com/Eurovision/status/990991711949279232

Hairography, fire shooters, lasers, colour… it’s exactly what we need for the end of the show.

If this doesn’t get through, Europe should have its collective head read.

FUEGOOOOOOOO!