The Informer

5 Nov 2017

Personal Account : Marriage equality isn’t just about superannuation and assets, but about how people judge you and your relationship in society

History, Marriage Equality, Media, Media, News & Politics, Personal Journals, Sexuality, Society & Culture, the informer

“I didn’t know gay people could have relationships… I thought all that stuff existed in Sydney & Queensland, not in Melbourne.”

There is a very different side to what marriage equality is all about. We have seen it debated in the press, on our social media feeds and on the streets of Australia as the postal plebiscite has dragged on, but it is important to remember that everyone has a story to tell and an experience to share.

Andrew Rattle is one of those people.

Volunteering at JOY 94.9 for the past 6 months he came to The Informer with a personal story that he wanted to share, a story that not only highlight the importance of the equality that we are fighting for right now, but reminds us of how very different things were not that long ago. And while marriage equality may not seem important to some in our community, the word marriage can have a huge impact on so much.

Knowing he was gay from a young age and entering into his first relationship with an older man in the 80s, even though homosexuality was illegal in QLD, his love for Paul was not challenged when he was diagnosed HIV+ and passed away in the 90s. But because it wasn’t properly recognised, what followed after his passing was not only baring the burden of managing Paul’s assets and estate, but fighting the lies from his family in a 2 and a half year long court case where he was fought to prove his love was worthy in legal eyes and not just his own.

“I loved someone who had died and no one remembered that all they cared about was money. And the picture they would paint of me in the public eye being gay, being a prostitute or the risk of them labelling their brother a paedophile.’

Making headlines in the early 90s, his story still carries truth today, even though more accommodations are made for LGBTIQ relationships in society, they are not seen as equal, and that is what we are really fighting for.

‘When your partner passes away and you’re in a gay relationship, people would say “you’re mate died, sorry about that”, but when you hear it in the context of husband and wife the sympathy that pours out is unbelievable, purely because of the word marriage. I consider myself married but if anything happens to you it’s totally different.’

“Marriage equality is how we protect not only our assets, but our relationships and what is rightfully ours. But it’s not just about your superannuation and your assets, it’s about how people judge you in society, how other family members judge you and how the law has to be developed to support people of same sex relationships.”

Thank you for sharing your story with our listeners Andrew Rattle.

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